I had never felt so cool in my entire life. The definition of a successful tinder profile (for a male) in Pakistan was around 2 matches a month. Probably because of the sheer amount of spam profiles on the app and the teeny tiny population of women that actually dared to overlook the societal taboo surrounding tinder and actually used it — properly.
This seems to be a good time to add that I've come across some girls who were so scared of showing their real faces that they used almost fully blurred pictures as display pictures. Here’s an example.
Anyway, the lack of decisiveness of most Pakistani women isn’t what i’m planning to talk about.. so let’s get to the good stuff.
The Good Stuff
As soon as I landed in Nairobi I started swiping right. Right, right, right and right. Lifeless old woman? Right. Obese girl? Right. Demon like shrewd girl with an explosion of pimples all over her face?…….. Right it is. In fact the only time I would ever swipe left would be if I thought that the profile was a spam.
I woke up the next day with
FOURTEEN MATCHES
In my three months of using tinder I’ve never had that many matches collectively. No one I've ever met has had that many matches… I was the ultimate man, man as he should have been.
The enormous amount of options meant that saying “Hi” to every single profile just felt boring AF. Scrolling through the list of names and individually sending people “Hi’s” felt wrong. Not to mention that I had researched just a few days earlier that most people that said “Hi, how are you” as an opener on tinder didn't end up with positive results (i.e dates). And since I was only in Nairobi for 12 days anyway, And I wanted results. I went beast mode.
Here are a few snippets of how I texted throughout
As for the results. Well, I’ll write about those in episode two.
Until then. Tata.
